It has been a challenging year, even without considering the language barrier and career. A year that made me constantly think about what “normal” is, what defines “myself,” and what it means to be “Japanese.”
Becoming a “foreigner”
During his last press conference, Ichiro Suzuki (a former MLB player) left these words (translated from Japanese):
“Coming to America, coming to Major League Baseball, becoming a foreigner. In America, I am a foreigner. Becoming a foreigner made me consider others’ feelings, and imagine their pain, and a part of me that had never existed before emerged. This experience, even if you read books or gather information, will not be acquired within you unless you actually experience it. I felt lonely and suffered a lot. I did. However, I now think that those experiences will be a great support for my future self. So, it’s natural to want to run away from painful and tough things, but when you have energy, when you have ambition, face them head-on. I think that is very important as a human being.”
I have heard that these words have been an emotional support for many international students and people from Japan who are working in other countries, and I am one of them for sure. When I couldn’t express myself and carried painful feelings, remembering these words allowed me to accept my emotions and let me move forward.
Watching Ichiro carefully choose his words during the press conference, taking his past experiences in as he speaks, still deeply moves me.
Awareness as a “Japanese”
Becoming aware that I am a “foreigner” has also made me strongly feel my identity as a “Japanese.”
It’s commonly said, but among Asians, Japanese people have a pretty “good reputation.”
Here, most people can’t distinguish between Japanese, Chinese, and Korean people just by their appearance, so there seems to be a default perception that “Asian = Chinese.” However, once I say “I’m Japanese,” I have encountered many situations where they suddenly look at me with special interest or even respect.
The “Japaneseness”
Stereotypes that people here hold about Japanese people include being “polite,” “kind,” “humble,” “punctual,” and “diligent.”
I think these images or stereotypes that people have about Japanese people are closely related to the values that Japanese people have developed under the influence of Japanese culture and social environment.
I don’t think that all Japanese people fit into these images, but when viewed as a group, I think these stereotypes are not entirely wrong.
At the same time, I also think that these characteristics of Japanese people are not “naturally” practiced. Rather, the ability to strive to be polite, to be a good person, to be humble, is what defines being Japanese.
Japanese people, through efforts to be polite, kind, and humble, have been able to express their “Japaneseness” as a result of adhering to social norms and group discipline.
With this in mind, when asked, “What are Japanese people like?” rather than thinking of them as simply “polite,” “kind,” “humble,” “punctual,” or “diligent,” I now think of them as simply “people who can discipline themselves.”
Disciplined
It’s not about behaving naturally, but rather, in society, being able to discipline oneself, do what is right, endure, and make sacrifices. Being able to behave as expected, like a common stereotype. It seems to me that the “Japanese image” is created by those disciplines.
Every time a world championship or game is held, there are articles of Japanese people picking up trash after the match. (https://www.nytimes.com/2022/11/27/sports/soccer/japan-fans-clean-up-world-cup.html)
Are those Japanese people always and everywhere the kind of people who naturally take such actions?
Certainly, there may be some people like that. But I don’t think everyone is. However, those who can take such actions at least recognize that it is better to pick up trash, clean public spaces, and leave places cleaner than when they arrived, and they discipline themselves to do so.
Instead of thinking that cleaning should be done by janitors or that someone else will clean up after dropping trash, I think it is an action that arises from imposing a social responsibility on oneself.
Without saying, picking up trash is bothersome. Cleaning thoroughly takes time. But they do it.
Even if they don’t usually do it, when they realize themselves as “Japanese” from the world’s perspective, they feel the label and the burden of being “Japanese,” and they think, “I should do it” or “I have to do it.” They can be aware of, and care about, the “social eyes” behind them.
I think such thought processes are our values, our beauty, and what defines being “Japanese.”
The Abnormal Normal
I wrote about this on a blog somewhere.
The people I admire are those whom I think, “If I were placed in the same situation, in the same environment, could I produce the same amount, or the same quality of work as that person?” When I think, “No, I couldn’t do that,” or “I couldn’t work that hard,” those are the people I admire.
When foreigners see Japanese people, or when they visit Japan, they might feel something similar.
Subways, big cities, transportation networks, and similar service formats are found in every country. But once you see them in Japan, you think, “In my country, we couldn’t do it at this level,” or “How can this be achieved in such a big city?” The same goes for hospitality. “Even without receiving tips, why is the service so good?” They can make you wonder.
These are not tangible things, but rather the atmosphere and norms created by consequences of people’s actions.
For Japanese people, these are things they have been taught by their parents, community, and society to recognize as normal. But for foreigners, they might not.
I came to think that this “abnormal normalcy” creates the image of “being Japanese.”
The Downgrade of the “Normal”
The easygoing nature, the friendliness, the openness, the diversity. Countries that highlight these aspects and welcome foreigners. There are certainly many good things about it.
I respect this culture and think there are things to learn from it.
However, I can’t help feeling a sense of not wanting that culture to be the “norm” for me.
Especially for someone like me, who didn’t become fed up with Japanese society and jump overseas but just pursuing my dream, various things that happen in daily life are just a concern. They catch my eye. It’s because what was not allowed in the community I belonged to is now normal here.
For a Japanese person who feels discomfort in Japanese society and finds it suffocating to adhere to such social norms, living overseas must be more comfortable. Because here, there are no societal (community) eyes watching over you.
For a foreigner coming to Japan to upgrade the “normal level” would not be easy. Because they didn’t have that “eye” to begin with. I think this is why people from other countries say that Japan is a must visit but not a place to live.
On the other hand, I haven’t had ANY situations in this past year where I had to upgrade the “normal level.” Rather, there were more situations where I had to ignore things that I used to be concerned about in order to fit in with the environment and surroundings.
Being in a situation where you have no choice but to “be aware but not take action” can be stressful at times, but in terms of downgrading the “normal level,” it’s like unloading a weight that was on my shoulders.
I’m glad I’m Japanese
By reflecting on myself as a foreigner and as a Japanese person, I realized that I might have found a certain comfort in the “rigidity” of Japan.
By observing the actions and attitudes of people around me towards society, I could think, “Surely these people are also putting an unseen burden on their shoulders,” and that becomes a trigger for me to discipline myself. And this thought process also goes back to the idea of how I should treat other people that “Treat everyone you meet as if they are carrying a massive burden.”
I believe that life becomes richer and deeper through awareness, self-discipline, and performing (pretending in some ways).
There may be stress and constraints that come from valuing social norms. However, by valuing those norms, we can also often notice the value of exceptions.
By passing through unnecessary filters, we can experience things that others cannot. Isn’t it okay to have a “true sound and a façade (“Honne to tatemae” https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Honne_and_tatemae)”? I feel that people who can perform themselves in a facade, rather than those who can only speak and act as they please, exude a sense of “modesty” and “beauty.”
I felt that I was really fortunate to have grown up in Japanese culture and social norms.
There have been many times when I felt the pressure of “this is how it should be,” or “this is how one should behave,” and it felt like it was strangling me. However, coming to a different culture made me realize that I am grateful for this rigid culture that at least nurtured me to be a “person who can be aware.”
Becoming “Japanese” as a “foreigner.” This has made the filter I have had even thicker.
I’m glad I’m Japanese. I’m glad I have carried this unnecessary filter.
Representing us and our culture
The advantage of being Japanese in a foreign land might only be usable for the first moment you meet someone. From then on, whether you can raise the value of not just yourself but also “being Japanese” depends on your actions, and that is something you must always keep in mind.
Before coming to Canada, I said that I would continue to do my best in order to enhance the value of the community I belonged to and the people I interacted with.
That motivation has grown even stronger after a year has passed.
It may sound grandiose, but I am determined to continue to strive to make people I interact with feel the value of being Japanese through me. To “cultivate” a better image and enhance the value of being Japanese, I am committed to continuing to improve myself.
Afterword
Since coming to Canada, I’ve started watching YouTube a lot in my spare time.
The videos I watch the most are Vlogs of foreigners traveling in Japan. I watch them every single day.
Every time I see a scene where foreigners come to Japan and are impressed not only by the culture and food but also by the high level of “normalcy,” I feel happy as if they give me a complement.
When I thought about why that is, I realized that maybe I just want to believe that “I, as a Japanese person, am special.”
This is because, despite the language barrier, I am unable to convey what I am thinking 100%. It has been a year where I have realized how hard and stressful it is not to be able to express myself.
Because of this, I wanted to feel that I am “Japanese,” that I am special, and I wanted to feel my identity. I wanted to feel what kind of person I am.
Everything I have written about “Japanese” may just be a fantasy created by my own sense of suffering. However, I firmly believe that living as a Japanese person, in a way that is distinctly Japanese, can lead to value in any society.
In the future, there will likely be moments when I seek approval and indulge in thoughts that convince me of my own specialness. Despite being made aware of my own ugly and weak side, I also believe that by observing me struggle and pretending to be someone else from an objective/broader perspective, I can deepen my self-understanding and engage in more profound thoughts.
Get on to your DREAM 